I am the type of person who very openly likes to appreciate people. This is usually well-received, except sometimes younger members of the opposite sex (I speak of you, teenage/young adult boys) think that any mention of their nice shoes/good looks/talent is my way of flagging them as fresh meat, targets for my powers of seduction.
To be honest, that is a perfectly reasonable assumption. Flirting very much involves flattery. However, I wish for the male species to know that even if you do register in my psyche as a hot tamale, all compliments come from a place of platonic admiration, as my ability to flirt is that of a potato.
I very recently told someone I found him handsome and I think it made our acquaintanceship/budding friendship spiral dramatically into the awkward-avoidance zone. I am sorry, handsome acquaintance! I didn't mean to come onto you like a rabbit in heat! I just wanted you to know you are well-made!
I know I could easily just bite my tongue and express my appreciation later, when the relationship is more developed. Or I could precede the compliment with a warning: "I promise I'm not trying to hit on you, but..."
I find that really lame, though. If you give someone a compliment, how they react to it should be none of your concern - if they think you are nutso or desperate for sexual healing, then that is their interpretation and has nothing to do with your delivery.
For me, everything that comes out of my mouth is meant to be taken at face value, because most times I say it without any undercurrent of a deeper meaning. Perhaps when others start dissecting my words to find the hidden message, misunderstanding ensues.
Also. Since when did "conversating" become a word? It's CONVERSING, people.
End
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